十周後

JoJo媽咪從178磅變成135磅 寶寶從8.5磅變成14.5磅
終於又可以穿上八個月前已被放棄的褲子(雖然是懷孕前最鬆的一條)
肚子上雖然還有難看的妊娠紋 但至少可以看到許久不見的腰身 (贅肉還是有啦)
十周的產假已結束 但一點想回去工作的意願都沒有 (只好再休4周年假)
還是不習慣當媽媽的身分 但當媽媽的每一刻都開心 (好啦! 不是每一刻但絕大部分都開心)
十周後 少了40磅 但遇到老同事 卻還是被問 "妳懷孕了呀?"

E.A.S.Y. vs E.A.G.E.R.

"The Baby Whisperer" says that parenting should be easy if you follow the E.A.S.Y. method: "E" for eating, "A" for activity, "S" for sleeping and "Y" for the 'you' time. Babies should be satisfied if you allow them to eat well, play well and sleep well. It all sounded wonderful and I thought we could just take it E.A.S.Y. However, what it fails to address is what happens when your baby refuses to take it easy.

Chamu is usually good in the mornings, following the E.A.S.Y. method closely, but when it comes to after 2pm feedings, everything goes haywire. He would eat, play and then fall into perpetual grouchy mood for the rest of the afternoon until he exhausts himself around 9pm. Last five days, he has been extremely difficult to deal with: eating every two hours while being grouchy, refusing any activity and sleep time (which means there is zero "You" time for us).

Today we called it quits when Chamu was still refusing to fall asleep at 9pm after two feedings and 3 hours of grouchy. We had to call our helper to take over and we left to get a foot massage.

E.A.G.E.R. seems to characterize our parenting experience better than E.A.S.Y. these days: Eating and Activity followed by Grouchy until we Escape but only to Rush back thinking we are bad and impatient parents to have left our baby.

Hopefully this E.A.G.E.R. stage will soon become E.A.S.Y. again...

Chamu Wins the Battle (and Mamu Calls a Truce)

So we have been training ("teaching" is a better word since Joaquin is not a puppy) Joaquin to 1) be on a schedule; 2) sleep overnight; and 3) to fall asleep on his own.
For the first few days, he was making very good progress: eating, playing and sleeping to our schedule. Last few days, he would wake up before 7am and therefore fall out of his schedule, resulting in difficult evenings and cranky days. We also would fall out of our schedule (not used to getting up at 3 or 4am) and become sleepy all day.
Sleep-on-your-own training is harder. We have established a bedtime routine where curtains are shut and Chamu gets swaddled. First few days all seemed too easy, Mamu would hold him for 5-10 minutes and he would drift off and fall asleep inside his crib. The last few days, he has become extra sensitive with the motion of putting him down in the crib and would start crying the second you move him towards the crib. After doing 30 some repetitions Sunday evening (and missing my dinner), Mamu had to hand him over to Dadu. Tonight, after dealing with Chamu from 5pm to 1130pm (3 feedings and countless repetitions of putting him in the crib), Dadu is now carrying him and sitting on the sofa and decided it is not worth it to teach Chamu to fall asleep on his own. Mamu is still exhausted from yesterday so she decides it is time to call a truce.

Joaquin Making Progress

So we have been training Joaquin for the last 4 days to be on schedule and also to sleep over night. The first couple of days he still woke up around 5 or 530am. We fed him some water before we put him on breasts for 10 minutes. Yesterday he woke up at 630am and today he woke up at 7am!
His schedule has more or less settled, not exactly to the minute but usually does not deviate more than 30 minutes. The key is also for us to learn not to stress out when he deviates from his usual pattern. For examples, two nights ago he needed a top-up before going to sleep and yesterday he needed a top-up around 5 pm and I have come around and learned to accept that it is okay.
I started also training him to fall asleep by himself in his crib instead of being held or rocked to sleep. For the last five times I put him to bed, he has learned to relaxed more and more each time without fussing around. Just now, he was tired and wanted to be swaddled. The minute I set him down in his crib, he was content and before the musical mobile stopped playing the first round, he already had his eyes closed... and I'm sitting here at my computer five minutes later. That makes me a contented little Mamu!
Well, we are leaving for Vancouver in 9 days so maybe we will need to start all over after the jetlag.
P.S. Chamu's pediatrician corrected me and said that babies can adjust to jetlag better than we do so we will see...

More Boxing

Chamu (unsuccessfully) tries to suck his thumb

Darned fingers keep getting in the way

I Miss Chamu

I have been on all-day conference calls for the last 3 three days. Even though I am home and I get to see him and know what he is doing, the fact that I cannot play with him or hold him (since I'm on blue tooth headset) makes me really sad. I miss him so dearly!
I don't know how I can go back to work if I can't even adjust to working from home!

Obsession

I have to admit ever since I learned that I need to go back to work earlier than I expect I have been very obsessed about putting enough milk away in storage. It was difficult for me to build up the reserve since I feed Chamu directly most of the time and I usually don't have much left after feeding.
I also need to wean him from feeding directly since he is very clingy and usually does not feel full after feeding from bottle (since he drinks faster than his brain can perceive satisfaction). But he will need to feed from the bottles at least twice a day after I go back to work.
Since I have three days of conference calls this week, I have to express instead of direct feeding. He needs to be bottle fed and I can squeeze in one extra expressing in between his meals.
I have put away two extra meals today. The downside of not feeding him directly is that he feels neglected and have been grumpy all day (at least that is my interpretation of his grumpiness).
My boobs will hurt in a couple of days due to the extra stimulation from the pump and I certainly am not looking forward to it.
I also have started training him to sleep overnight and feed him minimal from the breast if he wakes up before 6am. The goal is to hopefully have him wake up after 6am or 7am regularly.

Chamu got his US visa

Chamu got his 10-year multiple entry US Visa! We are off to Vancouver next Saturday and to LA afterwards. Let's hope Chamu is a good traveler...
Here is Chamu's visa picture, a bit of kiss-up with the American designer shirt (to show that we support the US economy!)...

Two-month Check-up

It's hard to believe but he is turning two months old tomorrow! At his check-up today, he weighed 6.05 kilograms and is 61.5 cm tall. Compared to the weight of 4.85 kg and the height of 57.5 cm measured last time, he is making excellent progress! Chamu was up for his two-month vaccinations. Today, he was to receive one oral dose and two injections. We code named the injections as lollipops since we don't want him to freak out whenever we talk about it. Anyways, two nurses came with one lollipop in each of their hands. They pointed one lollipop at each of Chamu's thighs and went "one, two, three" and synchronized their injections. Chamu was lying there in a good mood but immediately burst into tears and had this "shocked" look when the injections took place. He was a brave baby though and didn't cry too much after we picked him up.

We are warned that there may be some side effects like fever or swollenness in his thighs. So far Chamu has adjusted well but he remained lethargic for the rest of today and also lost some appetite (first time since birth). He just wanted to cling on to his daddy's shoulder most of his awake hours. Now is 3 am. We just finished feeding him and put him back to his crib after he woke up an hour ago. He has a slightly higher body temperature than usual but we think he should be fine. Let's hope we get the active Chamu back in the morning...

P.S. Just learned that I need to be back at work by early September. It really sucks.

The Apple and the Tree

Outgrowing his chair

At 2 weeks:

Almost 8 weeks:

Chamu getting an early start

Well, sort of (with a little help from Dadu). Thanks Auntie Margaret!

And with a bit of help from Auntie Carmen:

Auntie Bens & Cousin Waikit

Chamu modeling his forehand after Nadal's for Wimbledon 2026

Anti-Gina Ford Chamu

So just when we began to think that Joaquin is on schedule, he decided to show us who is in control here. After putting him to bed last night at 11pm, he woke up at 5am this morning, which all seemed normal to us. He fed at 5am, fell asleep, woke up at 630am and wanted to feed again. In between, he was fussy and required a number of diaper changes. Next thing we know, we started repeating the same loop at 730am, 830am, 11am, and 130pm. Finally he took a long nap while Dadu and Mamu passed out in their own bed (we had to hand Chamu to our helper since we were both exhausted). Then he woke up at 5pm looking for food as usual. He fed again at 5pm, 7pm, and 9pm with two baths (someone had a huge poo-not surprising after) in between these feedings. After 10 feedings and 20 some diaper changes, he is now finally asleep again and I'm lying here feeling so defeated... I guess I just need to live with the fact that he will never be a Gina Ford baby... Or maybe it was his weekly growth spurt day...

現在終於了解

現在終於了解為什麼媽媽的手比較粗
因為一天要用藥皂洗上十幾遍
現在終於了解為什麼媽媽的眼圈比較黑
因為一天八小時睡眠要分五~六次睡
現在終於了解為什麼媽媽的腰總會酸
因為一天要抱著小孩幾個小時也不能喊累
現在終於了解為什麼媽媽的嘴總會嘮叨不停
因為一天沒有一個小時不能不擔心
但是我現在還是不能了解
為什麼我媽媽當媽媽的樣子可以比我當媽媽的樣子漂亮... :)

Last Feed of the Day

Joaquin feeds on a four-hour cycle: 7am, 11am, 3pm and 7pm. After each feeding (usually takes about 45 min), he will stay up for slightly over one hour before he wants to be put to bed. He then naps for a couple of hours before the cycle repeats itself. His cry or fussiness is not that difficult to figure out in the four-hour cycle and typically comes in the following order: hunger, burping, diaper change, boredom and sleepiness.
Evening feeds, however, are a bit different. Usually I feed him around 7pm and then he will wake up again at 11pm to feed. After the 11pm feed, he usually wakes up around 5.30am the next morning. The 11pm feed is typically the most difficult. He would finish both boobs and still be howling for more. We either need to top it up with frozen breast milk or formula. Last week, he has decided to move his last feed for the evening from 11pm to 7pm. He would feed as normal at 7pm, play for one hour and then refuse to go to sleep until we top him up with some more milk or breast feeding. For three nights now, he would feed at 7pm, sleep at 9pm and then wake up around 4am. So I'm thinking if I can get him to feed around 8 or 9pm instead then he can sleep until 5 or 6am? hmmm...
What amazes us is his sensitive biological clock. How does he know that it is evening time and he needs to have a big meal before sleeping overnight? Especially when these days with the rain and all, Hong Kong's day is just as dark as its night... Let's hope that he keeps up the good work...

Playmat Time

Auntie Joyce has bought Joaquin this cute play mat when he was only five months old inside my tummy. We have tried putting him on it since he was two weeks old. At first, he did not quite know what to do. Then he became more acquainted with the animals and objects hanging on it. There are giraffe, cow, chicken, ball, and flower plus one bunny. The play mat is his favorite hangout (other than Mamu and Dadu's bed). Two weeks ago, he started paying attention to the giraffe. He often waves his arms in the air and occasionally he hits one of the objects by accident. This week (Joaquin just turned 7 weeks old yesterday) though he can use his little fists to bat at the giraffe and chicken. He's got quite good of hand and eye coordination. He can push away the pacifier when what he really wants is boobs. He can often puts his hands on the bottle when feeding. Yesterday, he were holding his hands in a clasp. Today, he was holding down my bra so he can feed without unwanted interference.
He is also smiling more and more each day. It's amazing how fast babies develop. They make progress everyday and we are certainly enjoying every minute of it.

無所事事的日子

我想我從上了幼稚園後
就不曾有長時間待在家裡無所事事的日子了
不是上學(從小學算起前後總共17年)
就是上班(算來也有十年了)
就算是上學放寒暑假 我也總是有事做 補習班 打零工
上班後 只要放長假 我便到處去旅遊或回台灣/美國探親
總而言之 我是那種閒不得的人

放產徦算來也有近7個禮拜了
我幾乎天天待在家裡 大部分時候連睡衣也不換
不能說是無所事事
因為照顧小嬰兒 還真是一個巨大的挑戰
但沒有正事幹 (好像也不能這麼說 因為我想餵母乳 應該也算是正事吧)
也沒有出門趴趴走
已經50幾天都在家裡蹲 而不感到無聊 好像還是第一遭

家居生活其實挺愜意的
跟老公一起
餵奶 換尿布 跟小寶寶互動
兩人雖然永遠都感覺睡眠不足
但只要看到小寶寶每天的成長過程
一切辛苦都值得 心中只有感謝 滿足 與喜悅
想到產假後要回去上班
不知道是否還能適應以往忙碌的生活

Cham Men

Baby Chamu, Baby Mamu

What, are you kiddin'? We got us a family here!

Life is good when you're a little Chamu

Confused

So we had to call a lactation consultant today. I have had problems with clogged milk ducts and haven't been able to clear them for weeks. I also think I have a milk supply problem because sometime Chamu just seems not satisfied. So she showed up today and helped me correct these problems so both Chamu and I can have an easier time feeding going forward.
She says that I actually have more than enough milk but because of clogged ducts, milk is unable to come out properly and it becomes a vicious cycle (since Chamu needs to suck longer and my body produces even more milk to be stuck in the ducts). She also corrected a few things that Chamu is doing wrong and helped me position the baby correctly but at six weeks old, he already has a strong opinion of what he likes and dislikes so he was not too happy about all these corrections.
She says there is no need to empty both breasts at each feeding and that pumping sometimes causes clogs (so it would be best to express by hand -- man but that takes hours). She says I should feed one side until it empties and the other side as long as he wants it instead of doing 20-25 min on each side and try to empty it manually afterwards. She also says no swaddle and demand feeding is better. She also said no pacifier is better. All of these are somewhat opposite of the books that I have been reading...
Six weeks into parenthood, I am already completely confused by all these different schools of thoughts behind child rearing. Schedule or no schedule. Discipline (allow them to cry themselves to sleep) or no discipline (pick up always when crying). It is already confusing enough for an adult like me and no wonder Chamu can't never make up his mind of how he should behave...

Lovely Aunties and Uncles

Haven't seen Beth since I-Pei's wedding and haven't seen Wei-Ting since their wedding and Elliot since birth. Elliot is already such a big boy. We were delighted to have them visit us in Hong Kong. Joyce came back for Frances' wedding... She does not look pregnant at all. On the other hand, I look like I have another baby on the way... Emily has visited Chamu many times and Chamu has behaved well each time so she keeps coming back for more...Uncle Mic and Auntie Katherine love to play with Chamu. They are our frequent visitors and despite seeing fussy Chamu many times, they are still not discouraged. Today they caught Chamu in a good mood.

Many other dear friends have visited or sent their best wishes since Chamu's birth but we didn't manage to take photos. Thank you aunties and uncles for showering Chamu with lots of love. We are so blessed to have you all to share our life and joys!

Dadu Puts Himself to Sleep Too

Fussy Time

Joaquin has become quite fussy in the last few days.
He would demand to be fed every hour sometimes and still refuse to go to sleep. He sometimes requires us hold him to sleep and wakes up crying every time we try to settle him down. We have to walk around and bounce him while holding him in order to satisfy him. He has learned to differentiate a wet diaper from a dry one and will demand to be changed even if he just pees or poos a little. Every thing is the opposite of what Gina Ford wants to train a baby to do.
I lost my patience last night while feeding him since he was squirming around and would not eat properly (and it was his 3rd feed in three hours) so I spanked him (don't call child services yet -- it was a light pet on a very padded butt). Later on, as I was lying in bed exhausted, I heard Jaime yelling "Joaquin, POR FAVOR! (meaning PLEASE in Spanish)" I jumped out of the bed and found a very frustrated Dadu trying to put Chamu to sleep for the Nth time, only to find him crying and looking like he needs to eat again (after being fed multiple times including a bottle of formula). I picked him up and gave him his pacifier and he fell asleep shortly (I was quite happy because so far I have not been able to put him to bed).
Anyways, we started to train him today. Trying to see if we can make him less demanding when he is fussy. We will see if we have the heart to keep it up.
One good thing is that he actually doesn't cry during bath now. Thanks to the little hammock (it was Apo's great idea) we got for him, he now realizes that he cannot fall into water during bath. Well I guess there is some improvement we can gush about.