One week Parenthood

So it has been one week since Joaquin was born. Last week at this time, we were struggling to decide whether to continue with labor after 24 hours or to proceed with the C-section.

One week forward, Joaquin is back home. Mamu and Dadu have been quite exhausted from lack of sleep but at the same time overjoyed with Joaquin's arrival. He has been a good baby, feeding on a 4-hour cycle (which is very good for a newborn since most of them feed on a 2-hour cycle). He only cries when he is hungry or needs a diaper change. Mamu's job has been to keep him full and boy, it surely ain't a easy task with Chamu having a Shamu appetite. Dadu's job is to keep him dry and happy (and to keep Mamu happy too).

Our confinement lady/nanny showed up yesterday and it has been a bless since we finally got some shut-eyes after one week.

We never thought parenthood is going to be easy but I certainly didn't expect it to be harder than work. But you know what? Looking at little Joaquin and all the promises ahead of him, we just want to treasure every moment with him even if it means no sleep and no time to eat. On one hand you'd hope that he will grow up fast to enjoy the life ahead of him, on the other hand, you'd wish that every minute you spend with him now can last forever so you have time to enjoy his enormous cuteness. Such is the dilemma of parenthood.

Waiting Game

So we started to feel some contractions Sunday evening but since it was not too painful so we tried to sleep it off. We woke up Monday morning and the contractions were gone.

Monday evening around 6 30 pm, the contractions came back and it became quite regular around 9 pm so we call the doctor and decided to go into the hospital for a check up to make sure Chamu is okay.

At the hospital, I was 1 cm dilated and the nurse advised us to stay. We then officially checked in at 1030pm. I was trying to delay the epidural until I was in the second stage of labor but by 1230am I gave up. I don't know how women do it without any pain relief. I am just not as strong and after epidural was in, I felt I was back in pre-pregnancy heaven. We went to sleep around 130am and now at 830am, Chamu is still not down yet. He has been on heart beat monitor and seems to be doing quite well. We are still trying to have natural but it now depends on Chamu's willingness to come out.

No News Yet!

I stopped blogging for a bit since there is really nothing new to report. This week is the first week that I am staying at home. I am still doing some work via emails and phone calls but really no intensive work. My bosses finally realized that I am serious about taking maternity leave so have been panicly trying to reassign my responsibilities to others. I can't walk, sit or stand for a long time given how big and heavy my belly is so most of time I just lie around. TV programs in HK are really limited and uninspiring so I often just flip channels until I get tired.

I am starting to get bored with life with no work and no baby yet. Mom is here so she is doing most of cooking, shopping and cleaning. Jaime is taking care of buying other stuff we need for the baby. May 14 came and there was no news and no surprise birthday gift for Lisa. May 16 came and there was no news and no surprise birthday gift for Lucas. Now I am counting on tomorrow May 18 being the last chance Chamu can make his way out on his own. Honestly I am getting cold feet with May 20 C-Section and may decide on Monday that I will let Chamu cook a bit longer...

* we tried out our newly acquired tripod and took the picture here... I look like I am actually having twins...

Brief Update

So May 22 is fully booked and so is May 21. This means if Chamu does not make any progress on his own, he will be delivered via C-section on May 20. JoJomami has been looking for a good date and a good hour based on the Chinese calendar for Chamu's C-section time but all the good times have been booked long ago. Now it is up to Chamu to see if he will choose his own arrival time.

Mamu is increasingly becoming short tempered because it is getting extremely uncomfortable so she hopes Chamu can make his way out on May 16 or 18 to shorten the wait...

*We have everything ready now thanks to Dadu who has been spending his last two days doing intensive shopping. Still need to get an air purifier and water purifier but I think we can manage for the meantime...

Yellow-faced Wife

Chinese people call women who have been married for a long time and are no longer taking care of their own looks "Yellow-faced Wives" (黄脸婆）. They are not attractive or even try to be attractive and have buried their youth in between children and household chores. They don't put on any makeup so there is only one color to their complexion: yellow. I have long vowed to not fall into this trap of becoming one of them even after getting married or having children. I always believed that putting on makeup is part of basic courtesy to those around you and given that I am a working professional, it is important to dress in suits with tidy hair, well manicured nails, and neat makeup.

Towards the last 2 months of pregnancy, I found that it is easier to become one yellow-faced wife than to maintain my original standards. In the last two weeks, I realized that in fact I only want to be a yell0w-faced wife. I stopped putting on contact lenses and makeup. I rather roam around in my apartment with Jaime's oversized t-shirt (with no long pants preferred since I am so hot all the time). I barely comb my hair (since it doesn't quite matter with a short haircut) or put on facial masks to maintain my complexion (yellow seems to be the only color anyways). I am just as sloppy as I can be (and I think if I were a man I would be turned off completely). Even when I go outside (which is rare these days other than going to doctor's appointments or massage appointments), I can careless how others look at me. I have at most one more week to go and I really do not care if I offend people with my look (anyways I am offended myself when I see the stretch marks on my tummy). At any rate, with a belly that is bigger than a 10-lb watermelon and boobs that are starting to look like hanging papayas, I don't think any accessories or make up can help enhance my look any more. I look forward to the date when I am out of confinement and I can perhaps try to pickup where I left off and perhaps try to restore some of the charm or youth left in me.

Just don't be shocked if you so happens to run into me and fail to recognize the old JoJo in the next week because I have given up completely.

here is a glimpse of 黄脸婆

Chamu Decides His Fate

Ok so we went to see the doctor again and Chamu is still floating. She said well he can stay for as long as two more weeks but at least the cervix is progressing. Mamu lost some weight (1 lb) but Chamu is still growing.
Chamu was sucking on his thumb when we did the ultrasound (already a hungry boy).
So here is the final decision. Chamu's official due date is May 19, 2008. Mamu will try natural delivery if he decides to arrive before then (even though the doc think Mamu may end up with c-section given Chamu's big head). He has not turned yet so he is facing front (an easier delivery will require him to face backwards).
If Chamu still doesn't show any signs of making his way out, he will be scheduled for a c-section delivery on May 22, 2008 (and he will be a gemini just like his father). I think this is the best way to put a resolution to this debate and struggle. Chamu gets to decide his own fate...

39 Weeks & Going

Chamu has officially completed his 39-week stay inside of Mamu. We went for a check-up on Thursday and the Doc told us again that he is still floating. Now it's Monday morning and we will be going back for a check up to see if he has progressed at all.
Dadu finished cleaning out the maid's room/storage room/ guest room after 3 days of intensive work. I had gone through four boxes of memorabilia from my banker days and reduce them to just one box. All of sudden, those deals/projects which occupied my life (or were my life) didn't seem to matter anymore. The chance of me returning to my former life seems to diminish as my due date comes closer.
We reorganized the guest room and Chamu's stuff. We did two loads of laundry for Chamu with his tiny little newborn clothes. As I was folding away the dry laundry, it still seems so unreal that we are actually going to have a real baby in our arms very soon. We are going to be parents?! We have to find time to take care of a helpless little thing from our currently already very busy life? How is that possible? The biggest doubt I have is about myself because even at this point, I am not sure if I'm really ready to deal with bottles, breast feeding, diapers and a crying baby...
Still no conclusion on how Chamu will be delivered. Our doc is back today and hopefully we will be able to make a decision. We had a 1-on-1 session with a midwife from our ante-natal class which was quite helpful but not enough to make us decide one way or the other. Chamu has been moving quite actively and is using my belly as his treadmill...Belly is tensed up most of time. All signs are indicating we are entering the last stretch...
P.S. one of my best friends just announced her good news, I am so happy for her! Getting pregnant may seem easy from all the celebrity headlines (especially for those under 20) but only those who have been through it at our age understand that having a baby is a true miracle.

Nesting Instincts

Dadu is going thru his nesting phase. For the last 3 days, he has been busy cleaning out our closet, storage, maid's room and the guest room. It's amazing how much junk one accumulates over a few years and our ability to fill up any available space. It is still work is progress and our study room now looks like a garbage recycling center but at least the work has been started.

We went for another checkup for Chamu today with a different doctor (since my doctor is away until Monday). We wanted to take this chance to also get a second opinion on c-section. Chamu has not dropped yet and I'm certain he is over 4kg now (since mamu is at 175 lbs today-heavier than Dadu now!). Well Chamu will certainly stay until next Monday when we make the decision on his birth method...

P.S. Mamu finished her big project today so she can go on maternity leave starting this weekend!!! Thanks to a very cooperative Chamu...

Trouble Sleeping

Having trouble sleeping these days. Belly is really big and heavy and I have turned the sea of pillows into a mountain of pillows (10 of them now) but it still does not help much. Luckily the temperature has dropped in the last two days so I don't really wake up in sweat anymore. I slept for 6 hours straight yesterday and it was quite a pleasant surprise given it's been a while since I was able to sleep for more than 3 hours straight. Today, I'm back to having a sleepless night though.

Part of it is also driven by anxiety. I don't think I have been this nervous about any other events in my life, not even the first day of school in the U.S. when I spoke no word of English. These days, I'm constantly worried: Will I go into labor before Doc comes back next Monday? What kind of delivery will I have? What kind of baby will Chamu be? How will we get through the first month? Is Chamu moving too much? Moving too little?

I know people say to get as much sleep as you can before the baby pops out but my mind is filled with all these questions and it makes sleep a luxury I cannot afford to have. JoJomami @ 5am...

Naming Chamu

Of course by now all of you should know that Chamu is just a nick name. I came up with this name because the baby is a Cham and it rhymes with Shamu*. Chamu has lived up to his name and is a human whale in terms of his size. My dad has taken on the task of coming up with Chamu's Chinese name since week 15. Chinese name is not easy. You need to look at the baby's Chinese zodiac sign (year of rat) and his last name Cham (詹) in order to come up with the right combination of strokes and characters. Rats, for example, cannot have particles in the character that has water (水), rain (雨), sun (日), mountain (山) knife (刀), fire (火), or strength (力). Rats are likely to have better luck when there is any of the following elements: rice (米), field (田), moon/meat(月), wheat(禾), people(人) , gold (金), cover/shelter (top of 家) and grass (艹).
Dad first came up with a very nice name: 詹鈞宇(Junyu). We stuck with it for a while but since Jaime can only pronounce it like jinyu (sounds like 金魚(gold fish) or 鯨魚(whale)), we had to go back to Dad for a second look.
My mom also has studied Chinese names before so she helped pick the best strokes combination that would go with Cham. After putting all the plausible combination of characters in a final short list, we sent to Mom & Dad in Panama for their opinion. Right now, we are down to two choices and still haven't made up our mind. It is a big responsibility since the name will be stuck with Chamu for his life time but I think either one we end up picking will be a good name for Chamu.
As far as English name goes, we have already decided on a name with Spanish origin. Forgive us for not being able to disclose it yet since we are afraid of people telling us about some ex-boyfriend or some dorks having the same name as we picked. Both names will come on the birth announcement with Chamu's picture on it so people will have nothing else to comment other than saying how cute Chamu is (yes, "cute" is the only word you can say; and I beg you to be kind to him and to my feelings even if he does not turn out to be as cute as you expect). Until then, he will continue to be the little Chamu that grows at the same rate as Shamu.
*For those of you who are not familiar with Shamu, here is the google image.

C-section

Spoke to a good friend of mine last night. She has had two babies and both time with C-section. Her recovery both times were quite well. I have somewhat made up my mind but actually I'm still quite scared of both ways of delivery. And I guess this is not just me because the other day I was chatting with J who is due 6 weeks after me, she is also quite anxious given that we are both first-time moms. But somehow Chamu has to come out one way or another.

Just managed to squeeze into my doctor's schedule next Monday. At least I get to have the check up as soon as she comes back to Hong Kong and perhaps we can have Chamu on the 14th (which coincides with my best friend's birthday!).

Still working this week. Chamu has been a very good boy and will continue to grow nicely until we see him next week.

Hot Hot Hot

When you are pregnant, it feels like you are carrying a portable heater all the time. These days, I often wake up in my own sweat 4am in the morning while Jaime curls up under the sheet next to me because he is freezing (with all the windows wide open and the ceiling fan running). The other day I had to move to the living room so I can stop sweating and go back to sleep again. It is quite a strange scene because I was always the one who is always cold while he is the one who is hot. But with a bun in the oven, it means your body can't do much to adjust the heat in the oven. I already cut my hair to ear length but within the last three weeks, it has already grown to almost shoulder length (thanks to super human growth hormone that my body is producing). I feel like shaving it completely like what Britney Spears did last year, maybe that will help me cool down more and leave me no worries about how to address the hair washing issue during confinement. I'm almost certain that it will match Chamu's hairstyle anyways (but he will look adorable and I would look freaky with the same look).
Yesterday Jaime and I went to Ines' one-year birthday party and met quite a few parents and babies. Margaret has not invited any non-parent friends because she thinks it would scare people off and since we are only two weeks away from being parents, she wanted us to get a taste of what parenthood is like. Most of the parents are bankers and high achievers who are used to doing things on schedule and at their demand but most of them admit babie are here to test your ultimate patience since they do not follow any logic and each of them has his/her unique personality. It is still quite a scary thought to think how much our life will change after Chamu's arrival. We are so used to doing things spontaneously like watching midnight movies and playing video games until 3 or 4am (which would put us as failures under the Gina Ford model). I guess there is nothing we can do to ease our worries and we can only take it one step at a time.

Chamu @ 38 Weeks

Today we had another check up for Chamu. I am exactly 37 weeks and 6 days. Chamu gained another pound and is now estimated to be around 8 to 9 lbs (Doctor thinks he is more likely to be 8 lbs than 9 lbs). At any measure, he is a big baby. Cervix is still at 3.1 cm so no chance of him coming early. My doctor is actually going away from May 6 to 12 so I guess the earliest Chamu can be scheduled for delivery will be after May 12. Still somewhat debating on the topic of C-section but with such a big baby I guess the decision is quite clear.

It's getting very difficult for me to move around. I can't sleep on the bed anymore. For the last two nights, I had to sleep on the couch because it is softer than the mattress. Even so I can only sleep sitting half way up. I'm approaching 80 kgs (I don't even want to convert it to pounds because it's disgusting). My stretch marks are slowly crawling above my belly button. It is hard to imagine that I will have at least another 10 days to go but if Chamu wants to stay inside and grow to be a 10 pounder then we will just need to wait patiently for our plumpy fat baby... We are still missing a changing table, a car seat and the nursing chair but have made some good progress in finalizing the list (especially now we have 10 more days...).